Whether your a baseball mama, or your child plays a different team sport, takes dance, or sings in the choir, the feelings are the same. You love to watch your children play, yet feel every high and low along the way.
When my older children played recreation ball, the first few days of practice were always foretelling. My baseball-mama questioning generally went something like this:
1. Who else is on the team?
2. What position did you play during practice?
3. Did anybody else practice at that position?
4. How did you play?
These questions were asked to determine, A. Is my child going to be a starter? B. At what position will he/she play?
All seasons were filled with ups and downs. Even if our player happened to be a starter, he or she sometimes struggled with a hitting slump, or made catching or throwing errors. A few of our children were known to airmail either first or third base, depending on their positions.
At other times there was unadulterated, shining pride. There was the glow of the golden gloves possessed by the girls, and the joy of seeing the power and precision in our son’s pitching. Home runs were some of the highest points ever.
Bad circumstances existed at times in spite of good play. Sometimes the coach just didn’t like them, or favored other players unfairly. One of my children suffered in that situation for three long years. Although we said nothing, my emotions followed every peak and valley.
The All-Star Tournament
During recreational ball, the only time more stressful than the beginning of the season was all-star team selection time, which occurred at the end of each season.
Each team coach was allowed to nominate three players, then the coach with the best record would select and coach the all-star team. Several weeks after the last regular season game, (when we still had a land line), the magic phone call would come; or not.
The all-star tournaments were always so much fun. The players received new uniforms, proud mamas sewed the Dixie League patches on arms of the jerseys, and friends and relatives came out in droves to see the games.
You could see great improvement in the players at the end of the tournament, because of the intense practice leading up to the games. If our children were selected, they often had a new-found confidence and hope in themselves long afterwards.
We bought the little paint sticks, and wrote stuff all over the car, so that everyone would know there was a bonafide all-star inside our little purple minivan.
One time I made iron-on-transfer pillow cases with our child’s all-star picture emblazoned on them, and t-shirts for the whole family. Even the baby had one.
Nowadays I just embroidery sweatshirts, t-shirts and other paraphernalia to wear to the games of each player. That’s what diamond mamas do.
The only downside to the tournament, in my opinion, was the parental angst felt if a child made the all-star team, but wasn’t a starter, or didn’t get to play at all.
“If everyone on this team is an all-star, then why can’t everyone have a chance to play?” said the parents of the 3 subs during every all-star tournament since the beginning of time.
As a woman who is neither an athlete nor a coach, I don’t have an answer for that question, at least not one that would satisfy the tortured soul of a true-blue diamond mama.
Only one coach was brave enough (or dumb enough) to call me and say that although our child had been nominated, she wasn’t selected for the all-star team. He proceeded to tell me that he really enjoyed coaching her though. He meant well, but that phone call went over like a lead balloon.
The Awards Banquet
Once the athlete is old enough to play for the school, receiving an award at the spring sports banquet becomes equivalent to being selected for the all-star team in the recreation league.
We have seen our children get the coveted MVP and other awards, but we have also clapped woodenly as they walked off the stage with nothing in their hands. We were happy for the other athletes, but our souls were pining for our own children.
For several years one of our children had a “You-Have-to-Wait-Your-Turn” coach. He was a good coach, but he would not let players from the middle school try out for the high school teams, regardless of their ability.
Underclassmen were never given awards, no matter how deserving, but all starting seniors were awarded yearly, even if the award had to be invented.
I have mixed feelings about this philosophy. At least the players knew that their turn would eventually
come. At the end of the day each person would be recognized for his contribution. However, the coach left before my child became an upperclassman, so all of the waiting and suffering was for naught.
Some Things Never Change
This year we have a college player, a high school player, and a recreation ball player. The college baseball season starts February 1st for my son’s team, and my daughter’s high school team has their first game on March 6th. The recreation ball player will have her season after that.
I am so excited. I love each new season. I can smell the fresh clay and the new spring grass. I will be there with accessories in the appropriate team colors and a swiftly beating heart.
Things haven’t changed that much over the years. My husband is coaching at my daughter’s school, and of course I frequently ask lots of questions about her softball team. My son came home from college last weekend, and typically, I asked him the following questions:
1. Are there lots of players on varsity?
2. How many other pitchers are there?
3. Which ones are as good or better than you?
My oldest daughter once had a travel ball coach that said something very wise. He said that parents see their children in color, but coaches see them in black and white.
Whether they are playing coach-pitch or college, my feelings are the same. I love my children, and I love to see them play. I will always want to know why, if they aren’t starting on varsity, and I will always see them in Technicolor, rather than black and white.
Blessings
Kristie
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Jennifer Wise says
What a great concept–coaches seeing the kids in black and white and the parents seeing them in color. I love your party in the minivan! How neat. You’ve got some great ways here to support kiddos no matter what sport or activity they are involved in. Thanks for sharing at #heartandsoullinkup
Kristie Schubert says
Thanks, Jennifer.